Five Ways To Improve Your Self Confidence – Part 2
Look People in the Eye
When you’re standing up straight, your head will be up as well. That makes it more likely that you will look someone in the eye. It’s hard to meet someone’s gaze when you are looking down at the ground. Obviously you dont want to bore a hole through someone, that would be scary — probably for both of you.
If I’m passing someone going the other direction, my tendency is to just look them the eye, nod slightly and say “hi “or “hey”– after all, this is Texas and everybody is friendly in Texas. I certainly don’t go overboard with it, just a brief nod and that’s about it. But it lets them know I see them, I’m aware of them, and I’m NOT afraid of them. Its kinda my “badass bitch” attitude!
Some women think you should look away if you’re approaching a stranger. “He might think I’m interested “you think. I’m not talking about a crowded airport – but when you’re walking down the street, look people in the eye. It shows you are not afraid.
I’m not saying to go up and put your arm around them and ask them how they’re doing – we’re friendly in Texas but we’re not stupid! If you cant manage any words just briefly nod and that will do. It says “I’m not afraid of you” loud and clear.
It may not be that easy to do if you’ve never done it before. I get it. Nothing is easy the first time or two. You can start by practicing in a mirror or with someone you know and trust to give you appropriate feedback.
Start by just glancing over at them and then looking away. Or walk toward them and meet their gaze for just a second or two. Then increase the time just slightly. Five seconds is a really long time when you are looking at someone without speaking. That’s why I suggest saying hi or whatever. Practicing just a bit will make a huge difference. And once you take the self defense course– you will have it nailed– for sure!
Diane Reeve Kirby is an 8th degree Black Belt with over 35 years of martial arts training. She was the sole owner of a karate school in Plano for 27 years. Her current focus is building confidence and safety for women and girls. Her motto is – Find Your Fierce!